1
00:00:11,033 --> 00:00:13,566
[ominous music]
2
00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:15,733
Archer: Where... where am I?
3
00:00:15,766 --> 00:00:19,266
Was a... airplane?
4
00:00:19,300 --> 00:00:21,200
I've been taken.
Step one: find a weapon.
5
00:00:21,233 --> 00:00:22,766
Ugh. Step two.
6
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Sit up slower.
7
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[bottle smashes]
8
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Step three. Find a--
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- Uh, I heard a-- [yelps]
10
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- Hostage, I was about to say.
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Great timing on my part.
12
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You? Needs work, buddy.
13
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- Why are-- - Say nothing.
14
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- If you make a sound,
15
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I will draw this surprisingly
nice champagne bottle
16
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slowly across your jugular,
17
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sending an arcing spray of
crimson life across the cabin.
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00:00:41,733 --> 00:00:45,433
Which would be a painful
but undeniably fancy way to go.
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Pros and cons.
20
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Now, not to get
all Gort about it,
21
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but take me to your leader.
22
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All right.
Turn this plane around.
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- Archer, what in the Sam Hill
are you doing?
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- Reassessing?
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This is your plane?
26
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Then why did you drug me?
27
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Are you doing
a secret villain thing?
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'Cause I think we've all
been expecting it.
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- I didn't drug you.
30
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- So you're telling me that
the good old boys
31
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were drinking whisky and rye...
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[laughing]
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like mixed together?
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- Archer, please just--
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- I am concerned
about the mental health
36
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of them good old boys.
37
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- [gasps]
- What?
38
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- Do you think their jobs
were levee-based?
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Okay, while that may have
40
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a certain surface-level
plausibility--
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- Think you might let him go?
42
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- Oh, right.
- Asshole.
43
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- Archer, I need you to be
a little less Archer right now.
44
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- Who could possibly want that?
- AJ, your daughter.
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She was kidnapped
from her Swiss boarding school.
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We're on our way
to Switzerland now.
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- What? AJ?
48
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[yells]
49
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No. No time for rampage.
50
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- Where's Lana?
- She's at home.
51
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Because I--oh, God--
52
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the thing is--
- You didn't tell her?
53
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You are so murdered.
54
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- I'm willing to accept that.
55
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All that matters
is getting AJ back.
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And Lana would be so devastated
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that she would make this
whole thing so much harder.
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- It's your funeral.
59
00:02:01,700 --> 00:02:04,300
Though more likely,
it's your hastily dug hole
60
00:02:04,333 --> 00:02:07,400
next to a conveniently located
drum of battery acid
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00:02:07,433 --> 00:02:08,766
Okay. I'll need a team for this.
62
00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:10,400
- That's why I brought them.
63
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- Wow.
You didn't skimp, did you?
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- We probably don't need
all of them
65
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but I'm not 100% clear
66
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what specific jobs
you all have now.
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Seems kind of nebulous.
68
00:02:19,666 --> 00:02:21,433
- Wait. Was everybody drunk?
69
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- Oh, no. I drugged them.
70
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- [snorts] Lucky.
71
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[main title theme]
72
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? ?
73
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Learn Thai online with BananaThai
http://osdb.link/bananathai
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[Pam screaming]
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AJ! Agh!
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- [growling]
- Yeah.
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00:03:11,433 --> 00:03:12,742
I thought she might react
like that.
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00:03:12,766 --> 00:03:14,600
- Pam, you need
to calm down so--
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- [growling] - [grunting]
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Ow, my--all of it.
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- [growling]
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Aw, shit. Fine.
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- You couldn't do that first?
84
00:03:23,266 --> 00:03:24,676
- This is supposed
to knock out a rhino.
85
00:03:24,700 --> 00:03:26,600
- Yeah, a bitch-ass one.
86
00:03:26,633 --> 00:03:28,376
- Where'd you even get that?
- Oh, I don't know.
87
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That big-ass pile
of guns and armor,
88
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and is that a rocket launcher?
89
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- I found an arms dealer,
90
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but I didn't know
what you needed,
91
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so I just asked him
for one of everything.
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- Got it, need it, got it,
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against the Geneva Conventions,
got it.
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- [phone ringing]
- Ooh, what's that?
95
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- Who's phone is that?
- It's not me.
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I don't even know
where my phone's at.
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- Holy moly.
I didn't put that there.
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- Hold on. Oh.
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You really did get
one of everything.
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00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:50,500
Okay, ready.
101
00:03:50,533 --> 00:03:53,100
- Now, they told me
to come alone.
102
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So everyone, silence please.
103
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[exhales]
104
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Hel--
- I don't know who you are.
105
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I don't know what you want.
106
00:03:59,833 --> 00:04:03,366
But what I have is
a very general set of skills.
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00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:05,366
Honestly, I'm great
at everything.
108
00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:07,066
But the thing I'll be best at
109
00:04:07,100 --> 00:04:09,100
in my entire life
is hurting you.
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Call it a hunch.
111
00:04:10,233 --> 00:04:11,409
Sort of like
the hunch you'll have
112
00:04:11,433 --> 00:04:15,400
after I splinter each one
of your vertebrae individually!
113
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Where are you?
114
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-[distorted voice] Yeah, no.
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Put the kid's father on.
116
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- Well, I contributed
half her DNA, so...
117
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- Not you.
The one with the money.
118
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- Hi.
119
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I know you said to come alone,
120
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but I was scared.
121
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- Yeah, well, you guys
always do that.
122
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It's basically de jure
at this point.
123
00:04:31,633 --> 00:04:33,100
- Pro forma, idiot.
124
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- I feel like he's not grasping
125
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the power structure here.
126
00:04:37,266 --> 00:04:38,642
- Well--well let me call
Michel Foucault
127
00:04:38,666 --> 00:04:39,633
and get back to you.
128
00:04:39,666 --> 00:04:40,800
- Oh, shut him up.
129
00:04:40,833 --> 00:04:43,133
We need $100 million
in bearer bonds.
130
00:04:43,166 --> 00:04:44,209
- Oh, well I'm sorry
to hear that.
131
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Click.
132
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Apparently Foucault's
still dead.
133
00:04:46,666 --> 00:04:48,666
- Man, he is exhausting.
134
00:04:48,700 --> 00:04:51,200
- Yeah, but his heart's
in the right place.
135
00:04:51,233 --> 00:04:52,200
I hope.
136
00:04:52,233 --> 00:04:54,800
- Okay, so $100 million
in bearer bonds,
137
00:04:54,833 --> 00:04:57,333
or you never see AJ again.
138
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Wait for instructions.
139
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You get it? [phone disconnects]
140
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- Man, you screwed that up!
141
00:05:01,133 --> 00:05:02,633
I was trying to keep them
on the phone
142
00:05:02,666 --> 00:05:03,809
so Krieger could trace the call.
143
00:05:03,833 --> 00:05:05,633
- Oh, was I supposed
to be doing that?
144
00:05:05,666 --> 00:05:06,733
- Damn it, Krieger!
145
00:05:06,766 --> 00:05:08,366
- This is basically
a tape recorder.
146
00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:10,333
Where would I even find
a call tracer?
147
00:05:10,366 --> 00:05:11,633
Oh. Here's one.
148
00:05:11,666 --> 00:05:12,666
- Damn it, Krieger!
149
00:05:12,700 --> 00:05:14,333
I need every single one of you
150
00:05:14,366 --> 00:05:16,633
to become the most competent
versions of yourselves.
151
00:05:16,666 --> 00:05:19,500
Now!
We are not currently rampaging.
152
00:05:19,533 --> 00:05:21,533
We will be cold.
We will be efficient.
153
00:05:21,566 --> 00:05:23,233
And we will find these people!
154
00:05:23,266 --> 00:05:24,376
- But what if we-- - Not now.
155
00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:25,366
But when we find them,
156
00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,666
we will go white hot supernova
blood rampage.
157
00:05:27,700 --> 00:05:30,233
We will make "Straw Dogs"
look like Clifford.
158
00:05:30,266 --> 00:05:31,533
- I think-- - Shut up, Cyril.
159
00:05:31,566 --> 00:05:33,376
We have to figure out
where the kidnappers are.
160
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:35,509
- Y'all, what about that weird
sound on the call, though?
161
00:05:35,533 --> 00:05:36,533
Maybe that's something.
162
00:05:36,566 --> 00:05:39,366
- Finally someone
with something useful to say.
163
00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:41,100
- But that's what
I was going to say.
164
00:05:41,133 --> 00:05:42,100
- Pathetic.
165
00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:43,266
And even if that were true,
166
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I wouldn't have listened.
167
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- [tape rewinding]
- Bearer bonds
168
00:05:46,300 --> 00:05:48,600
or you never see AJ again.
169
00:05:48,633 --> 00:05:50,633
[tape rewinds]
Never see AJ again.
170
00:05:50,666 --> 00:05:53,233
[tape rewinds]
Never see AJ again.
171
00:05:53,266 --> 00:05:54,766
- It might be possible
to isolate it,
172
00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:57,200
but we'd need
advanced audio gear.
173
00:05:57,233 --> 00:05:58,633
- Krieger, there's no time.
174
00:05:58,666 --> 00:06:01,733
- I have a place nearby
we can use.
175
00:06:01,766 --> 00:06:03,666
[bombastic jazz music]
176
00:06:03,700 --> 00:06:07,533
- So, did anyone else know that
Robert had a Swiss jazz label?
177
00:06:07,566 --> 00:06:10,666
- Or that Swiss jazz was
a subgenre called Swe-bop?
178
00:06:10,700 --> 00:06:12,100
- I mean, it figures.
179
00:06:12,133 --> 00:06:13,773
Switzerland is like
the jazz of countries.
180
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:15,333
It just keeps going and going,
181
00:06:15,366 --> 00:06:17,100
and no one has any idea why.
182
00:06:17,133 --> 00:06:18,600
- Uh, real sorry to interrupt.
183
00:06:18,633 --> 00:06:20,766
You cats were really
boppin' and a-boopin'.
184
00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:22,466
- Hey, anything for you, Bobby.
185
00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:25,633
- Rolph, see if you can isolate
the sound in the background.
186
00:06:25,666 --> 00:06:27,266
Then maybe assume
a constant tone
187
00:06:27,300 --> 00:06:28,766
and run a low-pass filter on it.
188
00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:30,400
[knocking at door]
189
00:06:30,433 --> 00:06:32,333
- Just keep everyone out.
190
00:06:32,366 --> 00:06:33,509
- No visitors right-- [grunts]
191
00:06:33,533 --> 00:06:34,633
[both grunt]
192
00:06:34,666 --> 00:06:35,766
[dramatic music]
193
00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:37,366
- Lana! [chuckles nervously]
194
00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:38,766
Oh. How did you find out?
195
00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:40,133
- Oh. I called her immediately.
196
00:06:40,166 --> 00:06:41,133
- Me too.
- I did.
197
00:06:41,166 --> 00:06:42,133
- Yep.
- Yeah.
198
00:06:42,166 --> 00:06:45,066
- [sobbing] My granddaughter!
199
00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:46,233
- Ugh. Stop.
200
00:06:46,266 --> 00:06:48,400
You're getting
old-lady juice all over me.
201
00:06:48,433 --> 00:06:50,466
- Lana, you have to understand--
202
00:06:50,500 --> 00:06:51,666
- Where are they?
203
00:06:51,700 --> 00:06:53,333
Because I am going
to kill everyone
204
00:06:53,366 --> 00:06:54,766
between here and there,
205
00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,066
and then kill them.
206
00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:57,633
And then kill you.
207
00:06:57,666 --> 00:06:58,666
[together] Called it.
208
00:06:58,700 --> 00:06:59,666
- What have we got?
209
00:06:59,700 --> 00:07:01,233
- I isolated that sound for ya.
210
00:07:01,266 --> 00:07:02,733
[clopping]
211
00:07:02,766 --> 00:07:04,066
Pam: Hoofbeats?
212
00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:05,500
- In the middle of winter?
213
00:07:05,533 --> 00:07:07,233
- Are we even
in the right hemisphere?
214
00:07:07,266 --> 00:07:10,500
- Duh, they're in St. Moritz
for White Turf.
215
00:07:10,533 --> 00:07:12,733
Ugh, it's so hard
to talk to poor people.
216
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,633
It's like there's gruel
in your ears.
217
00:07:14,666 --> 00:07:16,233
White Turf!
218
00:07:16,266 --> 00:07:18,633
The biggest, hobnobbiest
rich person event
219
00:07:18,666 --> 00:07:20,500
of the European snob season!
220
00:07:20,533 --> 00:07:21,766
What?
221
00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:24,766
- What does that have
to do with hoofbeats?
222
00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:26,100
[trumpet music]
223
00:07:26,133 --> 00:07:27,633
[bell ringing]
224
00:07:27,666 --> 00:07:30,633
[jockeys grunting]
225
00:07:31,300 --> 00:07:33,600
- Well, say
what you will about the Swiss,
226
00:07:33,633 --> 00:07:36,466
but, uh, they sure hate
the shit out of horses.
227
00:07:42,533 --> 00:07:46,017
- The kidnappers won't contact
us for another 24 hours or so.
228
00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:48,150
They'll go silent,
try to make us sweat it out.
229
00:07:48,184 --> 00:07:49,950
- But that gives us
an opportunity.
230
00:07:49,984 --> 00:07:52,617
- We kidnap them!
231
00:07:52,650 --> 00:07:54,317
- We find them.
- Thanks, Pam.
232
00:07:54,350 --> 00:07:56,217
- On the call,
those hoofbeats seemed close.
233
00:07:56,250 --> 00:07:58,150
Maybe they're involved
with the races.
234
00:07:58,184 --> 00:08:00,284
Ray, you should have
a natural rapport with them
235
00:08:00,317 --> 00:08:02,026
because you did that dumb
winter sports thing.
236
00:08:02,050 --> 00:08:03,884
- Oh, you mean winning
an Olympic bronze medal
237
00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:05,084
in the giant slalom?
238
00:08:05,117 --> 00:08:06,160
- Is that the one
with the brooms?
239
00:08:06,184 --> 00:08:07,350
- N--you know it's not!
240
00:08:07,384 --> 00:08:09,284
- Shut up, both of you.
241
00:08:09,317 --> 00:08:11,084
Cheryl, Robert,
work the reception.
242
00:08:11,117 --> 00:08:12,360
If they're asking
for that much money,
243
00:08:12,384 --> 00:08:14,284
they might be high rollers
in financial trouble.
244
00:08:14,317 --> 00:08:16,084
- None of these
dumb Euros like me.
245
00:08:16,117 --> 00:08:18,084
You "ruin the vibe"
at one party.
246
00:08:18,117 --> 00:08:19,750
- One party? That seems petty.
247
00:08:19,784 --> 00:08:20,917
- I know!
248
00:08:20,950 --> 00:08:23,684
And a total waste of that acid
I put in the punchbowl.
249
00:08:23,717 --> 00:08:26,617
Lamest childhood leukemia
fundraiser ever.
250
00:08:26,650 --> 00:08:28,317
- Um, where's Ms. Archer?
251
00:08:28,350 --> 00:08:29,817
She seemed pretty upset.
252
00:08:29,850 --> 00:08:32,950
- She's in the hotel room
"coordinating."
253
00:08:32,984 --> 00:08:35,650
Malory: The instant you see AJ,
254
00:08:35,684 --> 00:08:38,084
mow those kidnappers down
255
00:08:38,117 --> 00:08:40,084
like it's a bad day
at the Somme.
256
00:08:40,117 --> 00:08:41,184
[gasps]
257
00:08:41,217 --> 00:08:42,650
[sobbing] I hadn't given her
258
00:08:42,684 --> 00:08:44,684
her first gun yet!
259
00:08:44,717 --> 00:08:46,684
Wait. I did.
260
00:08:46,717 --> 00:08:48,817
The cute little Ruger.
261
00:08:48,850 --> 00:08:50,350
- I gave her
a broken walkie-talkie.
262
00:08:50,384 --> 00:08:51,350
- What do I do?
263
00:08:51,384 --> 00:08:52,784
Just point me at someone,
264
00:08:52,817 --> 00:08:53,917
and I'll rip 'em apart.
265
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:56,950
[growling]
266
00:08:56,984 --> 00:08:59,650
Okay, okay. I get it.
267
00:08:59,684 --> 00:09:00,750
[laughs]
268
00:09:00,784 --> 00:09:03,150
You kiss your mother
with that dart?
269
00:09:03,184 --> 00:09:04,817
- No one screw up.
270
00:09:04,850 --> 00:09:07,950
Or I'll put your bones
in a blender and hit frapp�!
271
00:09:07,984 --> 00:09:09,650
- But that setting's
inappropriate
272
00:09:09,684 --> 00:09:11,117
for large pieces.
273
00:09:12,117 --> 00:09:13,650
[suspenseful music]
274
00:09:13,684 --> 00:09:14,617
- Remember, Lana,
275
00:09:14,650 --> 00:09:16,650
the rampage is a fierce
but delicate art.
276
00:09:16,684 --> 00:09:17,917
- I agree with half of that.
277
00:09:17,950 --> 00:09:19,684
- Look, I am your
rampage Sherpa,
278
00:09:19,717 --> 00:09:22,350
to help you reach the lofty
heights on Mount Rampage.
279
00:09:22,384 --> 00:09:24,084
- Lana, we need to talk about--
280
00:09:24,117 --> 00:09:26,817
- You do not get
to apologize to me.
281
00:09:26,850 --> 00:09:29,160
- Uh, Robert, you may want to
back up out of the blast zone.
282
00:09:29,184 --> 00:09:31,817
- I respect you too much
to apologize.
283
00:09:31,850 --> 00:09:33,284
- You were the one who suggested
284
00:09:33,317 --> 00:09:34,884
boarding school in Switzerland!
285
00:09:34,917 --> 00:09:36,184
- And you agreed.
286
00:09:36,217 --> 00:09:38,317
But you don't get to transfer
your motherly guilt
287
00:09:38,350 --> 00:09:40,050
into a rage to soothe yourself.
288
00:09:40,084 --> 00:09:41,084
- And you!
289
00:09:41,117 --> 00:09:42,917
- I haven't done
anything wrong yet.
290
00:09:42,950 --> 00:09:44,160
Which actually
is kind of amazing.
291
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:45,950
- You are rubbing off on him.
292
00:09:45,984 --> 00:09:47,884
- Then why does he
still dress like that?
293
00:09:47,917 --> 00:09:49,884
- Lana, let's get AJ back,
294
00:09:49,917 --> 00:09:51,184
then we'll have a long talk
295
00:09:51,217 --> 00:09:54,317
about coparenting, emotional
boundaries, all of it.
296
00:09:54,350 --> 00:09:56,084
I honor your perspective,
297
00:09:56,117 --> 00:09:58,750
and I'm open to the idea
that I was wrong.
298
00:09:58,784 --> 00:10:00,684
- [grunts]
299
00:10:00,717 --> 00:10:01,926
- Seriously,
how did you do that?
300
00:10:01,950 --> 00:10:05,284
- How do I bond emotionally
even under tremendous stress?
301
00:10:05,317 --> 00:10:07,684
- No, how did she not
shoot you in the foot?
302
00:10:07,717 --> 00:10:09,217
That's how it
always ends with me.
303
00:10:09,250 --> 00:10:10,284
- Honesty.
304
00:10:10,317 --> 00:10:11,617
Also I heard about your feet
305
00:10:11,650 --> 00:10:12,817
and got bulletproof shoes.
306
00:10:12,850 --> 00:10:15,350
- I can learn so much from you.
307
00:10:15,384 --> 00:10:16,617
[light jazz music]
308
00:10:16,650 --> 00:10:18,684
- No problem. No problem.
309
00:10:18,717 --> 00:10:20,350
Man: Brownie! Is that you?
310
00:10:20,384 --> 00:10:21,550
- Not hearing things.
311
00:10:21,584 --> 00:10:24,650
Jesus, do they just pump heroin
through the vents here?
312
00:10:24,684 --> 00:10:27,650
- Brownie!
How's it sliding, homie?
313
00:10:27,684 --> 00:10:29,350
Oh, pretty fly skis...
314
00:10:29,384 --> 00:10:32,050
that you brought into
this party for some reason.
315
00:10:32,084 --> 00:10:34,917
- [sighs] Gerswan Ramschluss.
316
00:10:34,950 --> 00:10:37,184
- Nein. I call you Brownie.
317
00:10:37,217 --> 00:10:38,650
The color of your medal.
318
00:10:38,684 --> 00:10:40,150
So you call me Silvie.
319
00:10:40,184 --> 00:10:41,150
- Well, I would.
320
00:10:41,184 --> 00:10:43,917
But then I'd have
to stab my own vocal cords out
321
00:10:43,950 --> 00:10:45,750
with a ski pole
for betraying me.
322
00:10:45,784 --> 00:10:48,084
- Oh, don't be like that,
Brownie.
323
00:10:48,117 --> 00:10:49,784
- Guess what?
324
00:10:49,817 --> 00:10:51,684
I will be like that.
325
00:10:51,717 --> 00:10:54,017
- With your rampage,
you have to start slow.
326
00:10:54,050 --> 00:10:55,326
You need something
to build from.
327
00:10:55,350 --> 00:10:56,360
Trust me. But quick question.
328
00:10:56,384 --> 00:10:59,084
Why are we shaking down
a two-bit loan shark?
329
00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,684
- The criminal world here
isn't big.
330
00:11:00,717 --> 00:11:02,184
So, we shake him down
for a name,
331
00:11:02,217 --> 00:11:03,817
any name,
and we work up the chain.
332
00:11:03,850 --> 00:11:05,026
And if he won't give us a name,
333
00:11:05,050 --> 00:11:06,884
I cordially introduce
his femoral artery
334
00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:08,284
to a serrated hunting knife.
335
00:11:08,317 --> 00:11:10,217
- I thought we didn't
do lethal force.
336
00:11:10,250 --> 00:11:12,084
- Yeah, my position
on that has...
337
00:11:12,117 --> 00:11:13,184
[gun cocks] Evolved.
338
00:11:13,217 --> 00:11:14,350
[man clears throat]
339
00:11:14,384 --> 00:11:16,217
- Hey. So, uh... hi.
340
00:11:16,250 --> 00:11:17,784
- [grunts] - [yelling]
341
00:11:17,817 --> 00:11:18,784
[glass shatters]
342
00:11:18,817 --> 00:11:19,784
- Pace yourself. man: Ow!
343
00:11:19,817 --> 00:11:20,950
- You're rampaging too soon.
344
00:11:20,984 --> 00:11:22,160
And we need his mouth to work,
Lana.
345
00:11:22,184 --> 00:11:23,150
[sighs]
346
00:11:23,184 --> 00:11:25,350
I guess I'll just find
a pen and paper then.
347
00:11:25,384 --> 00:11:27,050
Robert: Okay...
348
00:11:27,084 --> 00:11:28,617
we've just got to figure out
349
00:11:28,650 --> 00:11:31,017
who here is
financially distressed enough
350
00:11:31,050 --> 00:11:33,050
to commit a serious crime.
351
00:11:33,084 --> 00:11:35,050
- Ugh, I'm bored.
352
00:11:35,084 --> 00:11:37,184
Hey, is there like
a central location
353
00:11:37,217 --> 00:11:38,950
that you pour
all the drinks out of?
354
00:11:38,984 --> 00:11:40,284
Like a booze vat?
355
00:11:40,317 --> 00:11:41,650
- Ah, ah, ah!
356
00:11:41,684 --> 00:11:43,884
I have been warned
about you, Miss Tunt.
357
00:11:43,917 --> 00:11:46,617
- That's not acid, is it?
358
00:11:46,650 --> 00:11:48,650
- No. It's DMT, I think.
359
00:11:48,684 --> 00:11:49,917
[phone vibrates]
360
00:11:49,950 --> 00:11:51,817
- Dang it.
I gotta pick up the bonds.
361
00:11:51,850 --> 00:11:52,950
Can you manage?
362
00:11:52,984 --> 00:11:55,650
Just find someone
who's broke and desperate.
363
00:11:56,517 --> 00:11:59,084
- Be
cause of the kidnapping-- - The kidnapping.
364
00:11:59,117 --> 00:12:01,617
I know. God.
365
00:12:01,650 --> 00:12:04,050
- Because I think you cheated
at the Olympics!
366
00:12:04,084 --> 00:12:05,684
I was ahead of you
the whole way.
367
00:12:05,717 --> 00:12:06,750
But at the last gate,
368
00:12:06,784 --> 00:12:10,017
my binding came just loose
enough for me to go down.
369
00:12:10,050 --> 00:12:11,684
And I think you loosened it!
370
00:12:11,717 --> 00:12:13,350
So, your silver medal
is tainted.
371
00:12:13,384 --> 00:12:14,684
- [laughing] Oh, yeah.
372
00:12:14,717 --> 00:12:16,217
Of course. I totally did that.
373
00:12:16,250 --> 00:12:18,050
All's fair in love and war.
374
00:12:18,084 --> 00:12:19,884
- This was neither
of those things!
375
00:12:19,917 --> 00:12:21,950
- You know,
funny you should say taint,
376
00:12:21,984 --> 00:12:24,917
because that's where I put
my medal while I sleep.
377
00:12:24,950 --> 00:12:26,817
Chillax out.
378
00:12:26,850 --> 00:12:28,617
Look, come to the stables
with me.
379
00:12:28,650 --> 00:12:31,084
If you can unkink your asshole
for one second
380
00:12:31,117 --> 00:12:33,184
and find a little
moral flexibility,
381
00:12:33,217 --> 00:12:35,084
it might be worth your while.
382
00:12:35,117 --> 00:12:36,350
- Um, where are you going?
383
00:12:36,384 --> 00:12:38,184
- I may have just found a clue.
384
00:12:38,217 --> 00:12:41,817
Or about to have the most
degrading hate sex of my life.
385
00:12:41,850 --> 00:12:43,784
Which is saying something.
386
00:12:43,817 --> 00:12:45,317
- [sighs] Wow.
387
00:12:45,350 --> 00:12:46,650
[man groaning]
388
00:12:46,684 --> 00:12:48,184
Archer:
He's reaching for the gun.
389
00:12:48,217 --> 00:12:49,784
It looks like
he's going to get it.
390
00:12:49,817 --> 00:12:50,826
- [groans, yelps] [bones crack]
391
00:12:50,850 --> 00:12:52,317
- Oh, he didn't get it.
392
00:12:52,350 --> 00:12:54,017
So, your name is Tibor.
393
00:12:54,050 --> 00:12:55,284
You run the muscle in town.
394
00:12:55,317 --> 00:12:57,317
That's them, I guess.
395
00:12:57,350 --> 00:13:00,350
And something very, very bad
is about to happen to you.
396
00:13:00,384 --> 00:13:01,650
- [grunts]
397
00:13:01,684 --> 00:13:03,650
- Here's the thing.
That wasn't it.
398
00:13:03,684 --> 00:13:05,817
- You haven't even
asked me anything.
399
00:13:05,850 --> 00:13:07,084
- [gun cocks]
- Hey.
400
00:13:07,117 --> 00:13:09,084
Can I ask you something?
401
00:13:09,117 --> 00:13:10,217
- Wow.
402
00:13:10,250 --> 00:13:12,084
Turns out we could
ask him something.
403
00:13:12,117 --> 00:13:15,150
Jesus, it is colder
than Shackleton's nutsack.
404
00:13:15,184 --> 00:13:17,050
Why the hell
did you send AJ here?
405
00:13:17,084 --> 00:13:19,217
- Don't you start!
- Start what?
406
00:13:19,250 --> 00:13:21,750
I'm happy to start something,
but I'd like to be aware of it.
407
00:13:21,784 --> 00:13:23,317
- Just what Robert said.
408
00:13:23,350 --> 00:13:24,784
I agreed to send AJ here.
409
00:13:24,817 --> 00:13:26,817
Was I subconsciously getting
her out of the way
410
00:13:26,850 --> 00:13:28,350
so I could concentrate
on my career?
411
00:13:28,384 --> 00:13:31,684
- Lana, introspection
is the enemy of happiness.
412
00:13:31,717 --> 00:13:33,917
So, my advice is, don't.
413
00:13:33,950 --> 00:13:34,950
Always worked for me.
414
00:13:34,984 --> 00:13:36,026
- Has it, though?
- [laughs]
415
00:13:36,050 --> 00:13:38,917
I-I don't know.
That's the beauty.
416
00:13:38,950 --> 00:13:39,917
- It is tough out there.
417
00:13:39,950 --> 00:13:40,917
Who else spent all their money
418
00:13:40,950 --> 00:13:41,917
on gold tiger cages?
419
00:13:41,950 --> 00:13:43,084
Seriously, is there
420
00:13:43,117 --> 00:13:44,350
a secondary market for those?
421
00:13:44,384 --> 00:13:47,650
- [laughs]
Why are you speaking with us?
422
00:13:47,684 --> 00:13:49,793
- I'm just bonding with my
peers about how debts pile up
423
00:13:49,817 --> 00:13:51,617
and sometimes you start
kidnapping people!
424
00:13:51,650 --> 00:13:53,217
That thing we totally do
425
00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:55,150
and talk openly
about as rich people.
426
00:13:55,184 --> 00:13:56,350
[all huff]
427
00:13:56,384 --> 00:13:58,217
Conversation is a lost art.
428
00:13:58,250 --> 00:13:59,217
[glass dinging]
429
00:13:59,250 --> 00:14:02,817
Everyone who's kidnapped
someone raise your hand!
430
00:14:02,850 --> 00:14:03,984
Lana: I-- [sighs]
431
00:14:04,017 --> 00:14:06,817
I wanted to give AJ the chance
to be who she wants to be
432
00:14:06,850 --> 00:14:08,084
and still be who I wanna be.
433
00:14:08,117 --> 00:14:10,617
- Is that impossible?
- Uh, Lana?
434
00:14:10,650 --> 00:14:12,084
- Am I undermining
feminism again?
435
00:14:12,117 --> 00:14:14,017
- [choking] - Yeah, kind of.
436
00:14:14,050 --> 00:14:15,950
- [coughing]
437
00:14:15,984 --> 00:14:19,684
To be a woman is
to be constrained
438
00:14:19,717 --> 00:14:23,084
in a nested series
of double-binds.
439
00:14:23,117 --> 00:14:24,684
- God, that is so true.
440
00:14:24,717 --> 00:14:26,817
Look, you're
the only fixer in town.
441
00:14:26,850 --> 00:14:28,360
Anything strange come through
the last few days?
442
00:14:28,384 --> 00:14:30,084
- Someone rented the warehouse
443
00:14:30,117 --> 00:14:32,217
where they keep
the White Turf equipment.
444
00:14:32,250 --> 00:14:35,817
If it's kidnapping,
I want nothing to do with it.
445
00:14:35,850 --> 00:14:37,217
I'll take you there.
446
00:14:37,250 --> 00:14:38,150
- So, are you, like,
447
00:14:38,184 --> 00:14:40,684
in a local stage production
of "The Matrix?"
448
00:14:40,717 --> 00:14:41,817
[horse neighing]
449
00:14:41,850 --> 00:14:43,150
- Are we going for this?
450
00:14:43,184 --> 00:14:45,084
And do the horses have to watch?
451
00:14:45,117 --> 00:14:46,350
Do we blindfold them, or...?
452
00:14:46,384 --> 00:14:47,350
- What? No.
453
00:14:47,384 --> 00:14:48,684
The people that I work for,
454
00:14:48,717 --> 00:14:50,084
they do illegal things.
455
00:14:50,117 --> 00:14:53,350
And we can use you
for ski smuggling.
456
00:14:53,384 --> 00:14:55,350
We do other stuff as well!
Cool stuff.
457
00:14:55,384 --> 00:14:57,217
Oh, and sometimes
kidnapping, hm?
458
00:14:57,250 --> 00:14:59,317
- You do what now?
459
00:14:59,350 --> 00:15:00,884
- Brigitte, thank you.
460
00:15:00,917 --> 00:15:03,284
- You do not need
to find yourself.
461
00:15:03,317 --> 00:15:06,817
You are that which is seeking.
462
00:15:06,850 --> 00:15:08,684
[shimmers]
463
00:15:08,717 --> 00:15:10,950
- Man, she's on a whole thing,
huh?
464
00:15:10,984 --> 00:15:12,893
All right, so we go in,
surprise the kidnappers--
465
00:15:12,917 --> 00:15:14,226
- Do horrible things
to their bodies.
466
00:15:14,250 --> 00:15:15,750
- Given. Then find AJ.
467
00:15:15,784 --> 00:15:17,150
- On three.
- But w-w-wait.
468
00:15:17,184 --> 00:15:19,317
I'm picturing a kidnapper
grabs AJ, right?
469
00:15:19,350 --> 00:15:21,217
I take the final perfect shot.
470
00:15:21,250 --> 00:15:23,917
AJ runs to me
with her arms outstretched
471
00:15:23,950 --> 00:15:25,284
and probably calls me Dad.
472
00:15:25,317 --> 00:15:26,350
- That's your plan?
473
00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:27,884
- Well, who put her
in Switzerland?
474
00:15:27,917 --> 00:15:29,050
- Oh, now we're doing that?
475
00:15:29,084 --> 00:15:30,084
- One, two.
476
00:15:30,117 --> 00:15:31,750
[door slams] [lights click on]
477
00:15:31,784 --> 00:15:32,950
[guns cocking]
478
00:15:32,984 --> 00:15:35,950
[dramatic music]
479
00:15:35,984 --> 00:15:37,017
? ?
480
00:15:37,050 --> 00:15:38,217
Peregrine?
481
00:15:38,250 --> 00:15:40,617
- Wondering when you'd get here.
482
00:15:48,117 --> 00:15:50,850
- It took me weeks
to break out of that prison.
483
00:15:50,884 --> 00:15:53,050
Weeks! Two, actually.
484
00:15:53,084 --> 00:15:54,617
I'm very good.
485
00:15:54,650 --> 00:15:56,695
- Get AJ now!
486
00:15:56,728 --> 00:15:58,362
Or I'll fill you so full of lead
487
00:15:58,395 --> 00:16:00,228
that local kids' test scores
will go down!
488
00:16:00,262 --> 00:16:02,228
- She's mad, but you get it.
489
00:16:02,262 --> 00:16:03,562
- Where's my daughter?
490
00:16:03,595 --> 00:16:05,195
- Good, yeah. That's simpler.
491
00:16:05,228 --> 00:16:08,262
- Get the money,
and I'll send for AJ.
492
00:16:08,295 --> 00:16:10,128
[suspenseful music]
493
00:16:10,162 --> 00:16:12,228
- Ugh. Well, she's not dead.
494
00:16:12,262 --> 00:16:13,528
[phone vibrates, beeps]
495
00:16:13,562 --> 00:16:16,195
- Yes, I have them.
Be right there.
496
00:16:16,228 --> 00:16:18,128
- [gasps] Go time?
497
00:16:19,495 --> 00:16:21,128
- Go time!
498
00:16:21,162 --> 00:16:23,495
Oh. You meant--whoops.
499
00:16:23,528 --> 00:16:27,228
Well, I'll say hi
to the clockwork elves for you.
500
00:16:27,262 --> 00:16:29,395
- They say that history
501
00:16:29,428 --> 00:16:31,528
is written by the victors.
502
00:16:31,562 --> 00:16:34,228
Well, I write it with the blood
503
00:16:34,262 --> 00:16:37,495
and tears of those I destroy.
504
00:16:37,528 --> 00:16:40,362
- Maybe you should get a
journal for this kind of thing?
505
00:16:40,395 --> 00:16:41,695
- And then burn it.
506
00:16:41,728 --> 00:16:43,062
- Lana, I must say.
507
00:16:43,095 --> 00:16:45,228
Motherhood does not
agree with you.
508
00:16:45,262 --> 00:16:48,628
It's so hard to watch
a good woman brought low
509
00:16:48,662 --> 00:16:51,628
by an inability
to resist biology.
510
00:16:51,662 --> 00:16:54,028
- Raaampaaa-- - N-n-not yet.
511
00:16:54,062 --> 00:16:55,228
Wait for AJ. [door slams]
512
00:16:55,262 --> 00:16:57,362
- We've got your money.
Where's AJ?
513
00:16:57,395 --> 00:16:59,995
- Mommy!
- Honey, Mommy's here.
514
00:17:00,028 --> 00:17:00,928
It's gonna be okay.
515
00:17:00,962 --> 00:17:03,328
- Leave the case
in the center of the room.
516
00:17:03,362 --> 00:17:05,628
We will bring AJ
and take the money.
517
00:17:05,662 --> 00:17:08,328
Do not move until we leave.
518
00:17:08,362 --> 00:17:10,528
- What is this,
the fox and the river puzzle?
519
00:17:10,562 --> 00:17:12,062
- Just do it.
520
00:17:14,528 --> 00:17:15,762
On second thought,
521
00:17:15,795 --> 00:17:19,095
what if I take the money and AJ,
522
00:17:19,128 --> 00:17:21,595
raise her to be
the perfect assassin,
523
00:17:21,628 --> 00:17:25,428
then gradually brainwash her
to kill you both
524
00:17:25,462 --> 00:17:27,428
for thwarting my plans?
525
00:17:27,462 --> 00:17:30,995
Now wouldn't that just be a gas?
526
00:17:31,028 --> 00:17:32,995
That means shoot!
527
00:17:33,028 --> 00:17:35,195
Sense the moment!
528
00:17:35,228 --> 00:17:38,262
[gunfire]
529
00:17:38,295 --> 00:17:39,562
[horse neighs]
530
00:17:43,795 --> 00:17:45,562
- Krieger,
what are you doing here?
531
00:17:45,595 --> 00:17:47,695
- Um... creating
a kickass battle sleigh
532
00:17:47,728 --> 00:17:49,095
with all the guns and armor.
533
00:17:49,128 --> 00:17:50,338
- How did you know
that would be helpful?
534
00:17:50,362 --> 00:17:52,595
- Helpful to what per se?
- Whatever.
535
00:17:52,628 --> 00:17:53,704
We need a horse. [horse neighs]
536
00:17:53,728 --> 00:17:55,462
- Gerswan ran out with a horse.
537
00:17:55,495 --> 00:17:57,695
So I did this.
And we didn't have sex.
538
00:17:57,728 --> 00:17:59,062
- You and the horse?
539
00:17:59,095 --> 00:18:00,595
[horse snorts]
540
00:18:00,628 --> 00:18:02,428
- Hyah! [horse neighs]
541
00:18:02,462 --> 00:18:04,028
Archer: We need speed!
542
00:18:04,062 --> 00:18:05,328
[mechanical whirring]
543
00:18:05,362 --> 00:18:08,362
[dramatic music]
544
00:18:08,395 --> 00:18:11,628
Malory: Good thing I brought
my hotwiring pliers.
545
00:18:11,662 --> 00:18:12,662
Pam: Yeah.
546
00:18:12,695 --> 00:18:15,195
Good thing I brought
my speedsuit.
547
00:18:15,228 --> 00:18:16,462
- Is it?
548
00:18:16,495 --> 00:18:18,062
? ?
549
00:18:18,095 --> 00:18:19,595
[gunfire]
550
00:18:19,628 --> 00:18:20,995
[mechanical whirring]
551
00:18:21,028 --> 00:18:23,262
- We are not shooting
at my daughter!
552
00:18:23,295 --> 00:18:24,728
- Aww. Not even a little?
553
00:18:24,762 --> 00:18:26,528
- What else do you have?
554
00:18:26,562 --> 00:18:27,662
[tranquilizer gun cocks]
555
00:18:27,695 --> 00:18:28,728
[both grunt]
556
00:18:28,762 --> 00:18:29,771
- Damn it. Forget the money.
557
00:18:29,795 --> 00:18:31,095
Get AJ!
558
00:18:31,128 --> 00:18:33,628
- Oh, I have the money.
Silly Gerswan.
559
00:18:34,528 --> 00:18:37,662
- One, two, three, go, Herd!
560
00:18:37,695 --> 00:18:40,295
- Boarding! Party of one!
561
00:18:41,362 --> 00:18:44,762
Not going as planned.
562
00:18:44,795 --> 00:18:46,995
- Rampage!
- [grunts]
563
00:18:47,028 --> 00:18:49,295
- I hate to do this
in front of your daughter.
564
00:18:49,328 --> 00:18:52,095
No, I'm kidding.
I very much like it.
565
00:18:52,128 --> 00:18:54,162
[grunts] [horse neighs]
566
00:18:54,195 --> 00:18:57,028
[AJ screams] Lana: Oh, shit.
567
00:18:57,062 --> 00:18:59,228
- Always in the nick of--ah!
568
00:18:59,262 --> 00:19:01,095
? ?
569
00:19:01,128 --> 00:19:02,462
[horse neighs]
570
00:19:03,562 --> 00:19:05,528
Lana: Whoa!
571
00:19:06,462 --> 00:19:07,695
- [yelps] - Hand.
572
00:19:07,728 --> 00:19:09,362
- Obviously, hand.
573
00:19:09,395 --> 00:19:11,295
What was I gonna do,
stick out my foot?
574
00:19:11,328 --> 00:19:12,695
- Damn it. Even now?
575
00:19:14,095 --> 00:19:16,128
- Man, he's fast. Oh, wait.
576
00:19:16,162 --> 00:19:17,528
[Gerswan yelps]
577
00:19:17,562 --> 00:19:19,128
- Oh, scheisse!
578
00:19:19,162 --> 00:19:20,462
[groans]
579
00:19:20,495 --> 00:19:22,328
- Little problem
with your binding?
580
00:19:22,362 --> 00:19:23,695
- Owah!
- Aww.
581
00:19:23,728 --> 00:19:25,362
Tainted again.
582
00:19:25,395 --> 00:19:27,362
[dramatic music]
583
00:19:27,395 --> 00:19:28,462
- [screaming]
584
00:19:29,562 --> 00:19:30,995
- Lana!
585
00:19:31,028 --> 00:19:32,228
? ?
586
00:19:32,262 --> 00:19:33,495
- [grunts]
587
00:19:34,795 --> 00:19:37,428
- Rampage!
588
00:19:37,462 --> 00:19:41,728
? ?
589
00:19:41,762 --> 00:19:42,995
- No!
590
00:19:45,795 --> 00:19:49,062
- Human airbag!
- Oof. [panting]
591
00:19:49,095 --> 00:19:50,728
- Are you okay, baby?
- Wow.
592
00:19:50,762 --> 00:19:53,028
That was epic, Mom.
593
00:19:53,062 --> 00:19:54,395
Daddy!
594
00:19:57,695 --> 00:19:58,995
- Oof.
595
00:19:59,028 --> 00:20:01,995
Well, I wasn't using
that heart anyway.
596
00:20:02,028 --> 00:20:03,128
[tense music]
597
00:20:03,162 --> 00:20:05,362
- Lana: You took my daughter.
- [coughs]
598
00:20:05,395 --> 00:20:07,628
Go ahead. Send me to jail.
599
00:20:07,662 --> 00:20:09,262
I'll only escape again.
600
00:20:09,295 --> 00:20:12,295
I feel so alive! [coughing]
601
00:20:12,328 --> 00:20:13,762
We could do this forever.
602
00:20:13,795 --> 00:20:15,428
Cat and mouse.
603
00:20:15,462 --> 00:20:16,695
Predator and prey.
604
00:20:16,728 --> 00:20:18,428
- Or not that.
605
00:20:18,462 --> 00:20:21,095
[gunfire]
606
00:20:21,128 --> 00:20:22,695
- I, uh--I think you got her.
607
00:20:22,728 --> 00:20:25,395
[gunfire]
608
00:20:26,762 --> 00:20:29,262
[gunfire continues]
609
00:20:29,295 --> 00:20:30,362
[gun clicking]
610
00:20:30,395 --> 00:20:31,762
Well, I'm glad I finally got
611
00:20:31,795 --> 00:20:34,162
a literal demonstration
of overkill.
612
00:20:34,195 --> 00:20:36,328
- She is exactly
the right amount of killed.
613
00:20:36,362 --> 00:20:39,528
Unless... got a spare vat
of battery acid?
614
00:20:39,562 --> 00:20:42,062
- I'll call Brigitte.
615
00:20:42,095 --> 00:20:44,228
- And then Mommy
jumped into the sleigh
616
00:20:44,262 --> 00:20:46,195
and saved me, for real!
617
00:20:46,228 --> 00:20:47,528
- Robert back on your good side?
618
00:20:47,562 --> 00:20:48,995
- Well, I mean, look at him.
619
00:20:49,028 --> 00:20:51,162
We have a pretty good
yin-yang thing going.
620
00:20:51,195 --> 00:20:53,462
Ya know, with Archer,
it was kind of double yang.
621
00:20:53,495 --> 00:20:56,528
And it's good that only one
of us has this weird job.
622
00:20:56,562 --> 00:20:58,295
- Well, when you're
this great at something,
623
00:20:58,328 --> 00:20:59,462
never stop doing it.
624
00:20:59,495 --> 00:21:01,028
You'll figure out the rest.
625
00:21:01,062 --> 00:21:02,028
[glasses clink]
626
00:21:02,062 --> 00:21:05,728
Like how AJ is great
at eating carbohydrates.
627
00:21:06,695 --> 00:21:08,028
[light jazz music]
628
00:21:08,062 --> 00:21:09,695
- You go into one
three-year coma
629
00:21:09,728 --> 00:21:12,228
and suddenly everyone
forgets about you.
630
00:21:12,262 --> 00:21:15,628
- AJ, meet Sterling Archer.
631
00:21:15,662 --> 00:21:16,762
- Hey, uh--
632
00:21:16,795 --> 00:21:21,495
- [sucking on juice]
633
00:21:21,528 --> 00:21:22,728
[sighs]
634
00:21:22,762 --> 00:21:24,028
- Hey, AJ.
635
00:21:24,062 --> 00:21:26,228
Uh, we had a lot of very weird
636
00:21:26,262 --> 00:21:27,628
and dangerous times together.
637
00:21:27,662 --> 00:21:30,628
But you were probably
too young to remember me.
638
00:21:30,662 --> 00:21:33,228
- No, I remember.
You're sleeping beauty.
639
00:21:33,262 --> 00:21:34,395
That's what I called you.
640
00:21:34,428 --> 00:21:35,762
I kissed you
so you would wake up.
641
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:37,028
It just took a while.
642
00:21:37,062 --> 00:21:38,695
- You--you brought her
to visit me?
643
00:21:38,728 --> 00:21:39,762
- Yeah.
644
00:21:39,795 --> 00:21:40,762
It was really important to me
645
00:21:40,795 --> 00:21:42,662
that she see sleeping beauty.
646
00:21:42,695 --> 00:21:44,295
- That's not what
you called him.
647
00:21:44,328 --> 00:21:46,128
I called him sleeping beauty.
648
00:21:46,162 --> 00:21:48,462
You called him
a sperm-delivery device.
649
00:21:50,228 --> 00:21:52,995
- I said that one time.
650
00:22:12,495 --> 00:22:16,495
- Made in Georgia.
651
00:22:16,519 --> 00:22:18,519
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652
00:22:19,305 --> 00:23:19,525
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653
00:23:19,575 --> 00:23:24,125
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